Podcasts, playlists and other media
We understand the impact a sudden infant death can have on a family and recommend the following media to try and help support families during this difficult time.
The lead up to Fathers Day can bring a range of emotions, which may be hard to name. Here, we offer guidance for fathers who are grieving their little one. We also share advice for those who are supporting grieving or bereaved dads at this time of year.
Navigating Father's Day
- Think about meaningful ways to remember your little one. This might be something you prefer to do on your own, perhaps something active like walking, or visiting somewhere special. Or it might be something you’d prefer to do with others, like planting something special, sharing memories, lighting a candle, listening to music or drawing.
- Allow yourself to feel however you do, without putting pressure on yourself to feel any other way. Writing things down might help put those feelings into words, or reading more about common feelings and grief.
- Think about who you can turn to to talk, or for support. This could be friends, family, or sometimes speaking with someone who’s not as close, such as calling our bereavement helpline, can also be helpful. If you’re working, consider letting your employer know you’re finding this time difficult.
- Be mindful of giving yourself space when you need it. You might choose to pursue hobbies and take a break from social media, or anything that can trigger painful emotions or memories. It’s okay to take a break.
Supporting a bereaved dad on Father's Day
Whilst looking at this advice, remember that everyone is different and every person’s experience of grief is unique. Here are some ideas to keep in mind, not forgetting that you know your loved one best.
- Make him aware that you offer space for him to talk, if he wants to. Remember that you don’t have to fix anything, simply listen and support. Don’t be afraid to use humour, as you know him best and you’ll know if it’s okay or not. Sometimes humour helps with opening up.
- Acknowledge the fatherhood of all of his children. If you know it, say the name of the baby or child who died. This is a reminder to him that you see him, and his fatherhood to all of his children.
- Offer support before Father’s Day. Sometimes the build up to Father’s Day can be much harder than the day itself. Often, acknowledging Father’s Day is more meaningful in the run up to the day, rather than only on the day itself.
- Send a thoughtful message or a gift. A simple text, note, card or gift can be a comfort to a grieving dad on Father’s Day.
- Remember that dads grieve just as much as mums. There is a misconception that dad’s don’t grieve as much as mum’s, but this is not true. Remember when you’re talking to him, that dads need our care just as much.
- Take his lead. Everyone is unique, and everyone experiences grief differently. Take your loved ones’ lead. If he wants to surround himself with people, help make that possible. If he wants to have a quiet day and ‘get through’ it, respect that too. If you’re not sure, ask “Can I do anything to help?”
We're with you in grief this Father's Day, and any day you need us.
Our bereavement support helpline is open from 10:00am - 2:00pm midweek, 6:00pm – 10:00pm on weekends and public holidays. 0808 802 6868.
Grieving and common feelings
When someone we love dies, we experience overwhelming feelings of loss and sorrow, which we call grief.
Living with grief
You may experience complex and overwhelming feelings following the death of a baby or young child.
How to support a loved one
Bereaved families share examples of something that someone said or did that helped them after their baby died.