Promoting safer baby care
We're here to empower families with baby safety advice. But keeping babies safe and empowering families starts with you.
Tell me a bit about you
I’m a teacher and I live in town near Hitchin with my husband, and my eight-month-old daughter, Alannah. It’s an Irish name, and my husband actually chose it only about a week before she was born! We’ve also got a dog called Cillian. I’ve got a background in early years – I was a nursery practitioner and then a nanny before coming a teacher so I’ve got lots of experience looking after little ones.
Have you ever purchased a product that you later realised went against safer sleep guidance?
When I first had Alannah back in May, we had a blanket that I always made sure was firmly tucked in. When she started to roll, we decided to use a sleep bag so that she doesn’t get loose bedding on her face. Since I breastfeed, I tend to find myself spending a lot of time on Amazon! So, I was scrolling through looking for a sleep bag and there were loads of options. I went for one that had really good reviews, this particular one I purchased had 4.7 stars and thousands of reviews.
Alannah grows so quickly so it wasn’t long until I had to buy a new one. I went to Tesco and bought a cute Winnie the Pooh set, and when I was checking the label for washing instructions, I realised there was a safety code on there. I searched it up, and that’s when I learnt that sleep bags have to comply with safety regulations. When I then checked the sleep bag from Amazon that she had grown out of, I realised it didn’t have a safety code. It’s tricky for parents because when you don’t know what safety codes to look for, you go for whatever is there.
On reviews, every mum was saying how amazing it was, but really it was posing a risk. Now I always check for the right safety standards. I feel a lot more confident now but it was really shocking at first. I told my husband and he didn’t know about it either. I’ve been talking to my mother in law about safe sleep as these regulations are completely different to when she had her children there just wasn’t the safer sleep guidance available like there is now. It was normal to put lots of teddies and blankets in the cot back then! Can you believe that?
I find it helpful to send her The Lullaby Trust’s guidance, particularly as she’s about to look after Alannah once a week when I go back to work.
Do you use The Lullaby Trust’s safer sleep guidance?
I use The Lullaby Trust’s safer sleep guidance a lot. I found out about The Lullaby Trust through a TikTok creator called Ruth (@ahealthvisitor) who had tagged them in a video, so I immediately followed them. I tell my friends to follow The Lullaby Trust too! It gives me a lot of peace of mind when I can read their advice, and know that I’m doing all I can.
Alannah was born in May, and by the time summer approached it was extremely hot. I used The Lullaby Trust’s guidance to learn what to do to make her as safe as possible in the heat. I used the infographics to learn how to cool the room down as much as possible, such as by having a fan circulating the room, and it was a huge help. It made me feel so much better. I also saw a really helpful post about how to make sure your baby has enough fluids in the hot weather.
Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the amount of baby products on the market?
I used to feel quite overwhelmed, but now I just don’t buy much apart from the sleep bag. I understand why parents might feel the need to go out and buy loads, but most of it is unnecessary. I think what are really dangerous are nests and pods that say they are safe for sleep. I don’t know why they’re allowed to say that. It’s dangerous misinformation. Unfortunately, not everyone is in a position where they can research what products are suitable for baby sleep.
I don’t feel any pressure to buy unnecessary sleep items for Alannah because I already have enough anxiety as it is, and I know buying more things will make it worse. It’s so simple once you know: you just need a clear cot. I just need her in the cot with a sleep bag, nothing else.
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I’d heard about SIDS but didn’t know much about it. When I got pregnant, the bigger my bump got, the more I thought about it. I was talking to my husband about it because it was worrying me about how babies can just die. It’s so scary. I was petrified.
How do you dress your baby for sleep? Do you change what she wears depending on the temperature?
I use lower tog sleep bags in the summer, to make sure she keeps cool. She also tends to come up warm, and I’d rather her be a bit too cold than too hot. I check her chest and the back of her neck often; to check she is at an ok temperature.
Do you co-sleep?
Yes, I co-sleep. I remember both my midwife and health visitor asking me if I co-slept, and at first, I said ‘no’. I was worried I’d get into trouble. But they were actually so lovely, and there was no judgment there at all. They just wanted to make sure we were doing it as safely as possible.
If you could give one tip to other new parents, what would it be?
I would say, although it’s easier said than done, don’t stress yourself over routines. Routines are not that important. We are at eight months now, and she is only just getting into a daytime nap routine. I put pressure on myself at first, but it’s important to remember that your baby is adjusting to the world. So don’t watch the clock, just deal with things at your own pace.
Discover more
Co-sleeping
Some parents choose to share a bed with their babies, while others sometimes fall asleep with their baby without meaning to. Sleeping together with your baby is known as co-sleeping.
Sleep deprivation
Coping with sleep deprivation as a new parent or carer can be tough. Your baby will probably wake up often and it can be hard to stay awake to keep them safe. You’re not alone.
Helen’s story
Helen lives in south-west London with her partner Gareth, her three-year-old Aerith, and their cat Bella. The Lullaby Trust’s resources support her in her work as a nurse, and as a mother.
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